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Nothing Tastes As Good As Skinny Feels

Nothing Tastes As Good As Skinny Feels

24 May 2010

Hourglass pear shape whateves, I respect the curvy women out there, but frankly if I wanted to see curvy women I would gawk at Kirstie Ally’s fucking Twitter all day. There’s an old saying that goes, “You can never be too thin or too rich”, quoted by basically everyone from Paris Hilton, Kate Moss to Nikki Sixx. Well my friends it is entirely true. And lets be honest if the Vera doesn’t fit you, well then, you alter yourself to fit the Vera.

For instance: the Kardashian sisters designed a recent line for BeBe, a medium is a small a small is an extra small, and well…etcetera, etcetera. We’re in a generation where if your not skinny well then lets face it, your not that cool. It’s clearly obvious that we are more attracted and drawn to thinner more fit people than larger/curvier people…clearly. And when everyone and their mom has and effing diet book or diet plan out there, how hard can it be.

I’m not saying starve yourself. Come on, enjoy those amazing pizzas from big slice, those poutine’s from Poutini’s, but if you’re going to indulge in such things, then you’re going to need some heavy workouts. If that’s not your style than do it my way and skip 3 or 4 meals and DANCE, DANCE, DANCE the carbs away.

I’m not saying saying drop everything and become a total skelator, but really you’re not the only one that has to look at yourself. Just love yourself and the skin your in and don’t stretch it out. And if that doesn’t make you feel any better, this will…SPOTTED KE$HA…TOTES GAINED A FEW POUNDS!

Words: Gay Rob

About the Author
  • Z.

    If you’re going to publish a post in which the content is offensive, moronic, bullshit, at least edit it for spelling and grammar. This is absurd. So absurd in fact, that I’m really hoping it’s a joke. It must be a joke. Because if not, you’re really undermining all the hard work you do with this nonsense Anna.

  • Bilbo

    The problem with instant communication is that even the dumbest people feel the need to communicate their inane thoughts.

  • http://www.pinkmafia.ca anna

    Z-not sure who you are, but thanks for the grammar catch, was an un-edited version that went up by accident. Lucky for me, I have anonymous comments to call me out on every single mistake we ever make. Bilbo, would love to read your blog, please pass on the link. Glad you are enjoying Gay Rob’s take on “fashion”

  • El

    geez, please don’t put this shit into young women’s heads. they actually look up to you and might believe it.

    this does not read as a take on fashion. “Fashion is what you buy”.

  • http://toohigh2cum.tumblr.com blackslashwhite

    its nice to hear someone call out all the fat girls. do whatever it takes..

  • M

    Somebody was obviously a fat kid.

  • jt

    i thought i liked the pinkmafia blog, but then this was posted.Even if it’s supposed to be a satirical piece, its not funny or clever. UNFOLLOW!

  • Anon

    Honestly, we all think it! So thanks for being brave enough to actually post it!

    And to all the haters: You are what you eat. No one ever gets fat from over-eating fruits and veggies, so really by arguing this post you are against health!

  • rj

    oh god, i’d love to see what all these brainless PR twits will be doing in 10 years – fucking morons, nothing they’ll be donefor old whores and hags. How retarded do you have to be to work in PR is that why only stupid flakey, vapid useless dumb chicks do it???? It’s not even authentic Public Relations, its event planning done by high school drop-outs or colllege?hahahah (ladies still live paycheck to paycheck or with their parents still and never grew out of that “i wanna be a fashion designer phase” grads for who?? for clubs!! and salons! and restaurants and no-name fly-by night labels!! HAHAHAHHAAHAHAH – like get fucking serious, as if BP would ever call you because they just fucked up and spewed millions of litres of oil into the fucking ocean. anyone who follows these moronic dipshits are pathetic retards…holy fuck wish google had a filter

  • L. D.

    I guess it makes sense to post something like this when the rest of your blog never gets any comments and you desperately crave attention.

  • Melania Fedyna

    Dear rj & jt — not everyone who works for PR is a moron and you can’t group them together based on a blog post which kind of has nothing to do with that.

    I work for this blog, and although I don’t agree with a post, I’m not going to being calling everyone represented an idiot (even though this entry exhibits us in a bad light).

    p.s. I’d LOVE to know what you’re doing for the oil crisis. And I don’t mean prowling nude beaches for unsuspecting tanning victims.

  • shona

    in the fashion industry, if you are a size 10, you are considered plus sized…

    in reality, . some us have to work VERY hard at just being the size we are, despite the exercise and diet we do… , the size ten just won’t happen.

    so .. some one passing by me in the street won’t know what i had for lunch, or how many crunches i did at my excercise class.. all they will see is that i am not a size 10. but yes, a fat grrrl.

    no matter what size i am, i will ALWAYS long to wear a Galiano, or a Betsy Johnson. it is a shame that i can’t slim down to a size ten cuz i know i would totally rock that designer look.

  • skinny jeans for toddlers

    I think this is a horrible post. Of course we want to see people be healthy and respect their body. But it’s posts like this that perpetuate an image of myself and of others that are defined solely by big business and silly advertisements. We will never be good enough or outrageous enough or thin enough to meet anyone’s standards let alone our own very own. It’s disappointing that we cannot get past the shape of our bodies. Let’s not alienate ourselves even further! Let’s come up for air out of our asses, and begin to pay attention to more interesting and less inanely provocative things to discuss. I have faith we can but we need blogs like this to show us how. Pink Mafia has proven to be a force to be reckoned with. Don’t puke it all away.

  • Dan

    offensive, mis-informed shite.

    hey, guess what? if you binge on pizza and poutine and starve yourself for 4 meals you have DISORDERED EATING. find yourself a therapist, and quit perpetuating the kind of drivel that poisons people’s minds.

  • rj

    you just proved that you are an idiot (the true menaing of the word – ignorant for at least a minimum of two blatantly conspicuous reasons 1) My slight about you not being someone that could handle a real public relations crisis like what BP is facing now, and 2) that useless piece of information you posted about some shitty singer who got a bit chunky: thank-you for that contribution to society. You thoughtlessy posted insolent material for your audience and then made apologetic excuse for yourself as a defense when you got flack for it (are you that dense to not think you should expect unfavourable responses)?? Do you not by now who your audience is an dwhat they would be senstive to or do you not do your research?? I know of sooooo many “Women” in the faux PR industry (event planning is not PR and getting companies to sponsor their products/donate can be done by a monkey – as long as their is an audience, a company will oblige to most requesti), and everyone makes fun of them behind their back, even their “friends” (and I bet each of them adds everyone they breathe onto on Facebook). They are all flakes.

    No, I’m not doing anything for the “oli crisis because it is not my fucking crisis to handle!! The company and the US government screwed up big-time and they need to be held accountable. I have my own serious involvemnet in a cause that I dedicate my volunteer time to which is of major significance and the work I contribute amounts to a full-time job, I am not like you flakey ditzes who pretend to be compassionate about every single charity cause their friend or someone they admire mentions.

    By the way: I’m not a dude and tanned skin is nasty and trashy (what’s even more gross is seeing the cumulative damage done to a sunworshipper’s skin who has tattoos 15 years down the line: inked, rippled leather…..beautiful……

    I have no desire to speak to you further

  • http://www.pinkmafia.ca anna

    are we responsible for an oil crisis now?
    shit, i am seriously missing some memos around here

  • Melania Fedyna

    Hey rj, I didn’t write this, so quit generalizing the entire company with your bullet points. All I want for you is to know that different people have different thoughts + opinions, and content aside, you slamming the entire co. is completely uncalled for.

    Also, last time I checked, BP can’t even handle their own situation, so…..really leveled comparison there. Blog vs environmental travesty. Naturally, one would associate the two.

  • rj

    HOLY MOTHERFUCK – I an’t belive how obtuse and just fucking ridiculously DUMB you people who write this blog there. You again poved your massive ignorant stupididty and lack of intelligence by focusing on the little analogy I made about BP’s oil mess – let me say it like you’re a two year old: I only mentioned BP because they are dealing with a massive PR crisis that requires sophisticated expertise, intellect, knowledge that you do not possess. You ask for sponsorships and make-up guest-lists, gay littel party planning, ordering flowers, cupcakes, shitty dumb-girl, 2-digit I.Q. useless crap like that other peple are too busy or could care less to waste their time on. Your little brain didn’t register that and you idiots thought I was “blaming you for an oil crisis”. You should read more books instead of tabloid magazines.

    Yes, all of you little PR girl flakes are stupid. You prove by the nature of the “work” you do; and by the shit you post here. it’s all regurgitated useless, unoriginal vile crap. If you were smart, you wouldn’t be in PR.

    Flakey 1 and Falkey 2: bullet poits require bullets. A group of sentences that expail a similar idea are called a PARAGRAPH.

    So go fuck yourself.

  • Melania Fedyna

    And YOU, dear friend, prove your own ignorance by AGAIN G-E-N-E-R-A-L-I-Z-I-N-G everyone over one little blog post. Sorry to take it here, but YOU DON’T KNOW ME. So how dare you asses my intelligence based on one blog entry that I did not personally write, and judge my work when you have no clue as to what it is I do in my personal life, or what my involvement is with this company.

    You’re allowed your skewed opinion about this industry, but don’t be personally attacking people you know nothing about. What don’t you understand? Why are you so bitter?

    You’ve just proven your level of maturity by telling me to go fuck myself. I thought you were done talking to me? Way to be the irritable child in this situation.

    Go ahead, add me on Facebook. Let’s compare lives. Oh, and I need to up my friend count….because that’s how I manipulate the outside world into associating with me.

  • http://www.pinkmafia.ca anna

    OMG we have cupcakes??? Hello, can someone please tell me when we order cupcakes next? And flowers. I could use a bit of both. Between this oil crisis we’re now responsible for, our sudden lack of sophistication and all these cupcakes and flowers floating around that i’m unaware of, it’s like I don’t even work here anymore.

    Can someone please keep me informed. Sounds like I’m missing out big time.

  • cat

    hey rj—get off the internet before you explode. seriously.

  • rj

    “You don’t know me” “asses” hahahhaha, were you crying sweetie, aawwwww, still dumb and proving it. yes all you little PR flakes. go have a cupcake – one with pink icing….and go fuck yourself

    can’t even defend themselves without souding stupid – shouldn’t you be watching Sex & the City 2 now or ordering flowers & writing guest lists instead of diddling with blogs: everyone is so impressed with the little random thoughts bouncing around in your empty heads….yes, you can be generalized into one dumbass bunch of flakes – you prove it every second – nobody has a favourable, appreciative outlook on – you’re useless, disepsible, unskilled, etc

    i’ll let you get back to “work”

    by the way D, B, G, L and the rest of the middle-age sad pathetic pack say hi (and then they badmouthed you)

  • http://www.sex.com Codename: Codename Cody

    I guess when this article was drunkenly filed at 5 AM it seemed hilariously inflammatory and irreverent. Possibly even funny?

    Growing up in a small town in Ontario, I was pressured by peers to ostracize, insult, and attack, well… anybody who wasn’t a straight, white, male wearing a baseball cap or hockey jersey.
    I never succumbed to that pressuring, and I never saw eye-to-eye with any of those douchebags until now–

    Finally, here’s a gay I could really get into bashing.

  • Kass

    you all could possibly be upset because you didn’t have the guts to comment first.
    it’s just as offensive to people who believe otherwise to have to listen to all this pro-originality stuff too… irritating to say the least.

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  • Wow.

    I am literally speechless. I have been sitting here for almost 10 minutes now just trying to think of something witty to reply to this. I decided I will just go with whatever comes to mind.

    Whoever wrote this has one the most fucked up point of views I have ever seen. God knows what you look like, you may be the skinniest in the world, or the biggest but I don’t give a fuck. Either way you clearly have no common sense and a few problems of your own. I cannot even wrap my head around this post. You contradicted yourself at least 4 times per sentence. This disgusts me.

  • http://www.pinkmafia.ca anna

    we got a lot of feedback on this post. thanks for sharing

  • melanie

    We’re in a generation where if your not skinny well then lets face it, your not that cool.

    “your”?!?!?!

    YOU’RE*

    as in, the contraction for “you are”.

    who the fuck wrote this, a second grade student?

  • Thegrimviolinx

    This is TERRIBLY written. Wow. First of all, think about what you’re saying- as an extremely skinny grown female, I definitely get a lot less attention than my curvy counterparts. Second of all, this is brutal and all untrue. I’m not sure what your goal was in writing this, but it seems as if you WANT impressionable girls to starve themselves or something. First of all, check for articles for grammatical mistakes (I found countless ones), and maybe try writing something that’s not completely bullshit.

  • Tache4ever

    This was obviously written from your eating disorder’s point of view… Skipping 3 or 4 meals is definitely an eating disorder, by the way.
    “I’m not saying starve yourself… do it my way and skip 3 or 4 meals…” I hate to break it to you, but that IS starving yourself…

  • Classified

    those skinny girls are so fucking DISCUSTING i would rather commit harakiri than laing in bed with the skeletors

  • Whitney

    “if I wanted to see curvy women I would gawk at Kirstie Ally’s fucking Twitter all day.”

    Wow, someone’s writing from their jealous bitch self. Seriously, women were meant to have curves, it’s more appealing than a woman who does it “your way and skips 3 or 4 meals.”

    It’s complete bullshit you’re writing here. My bet is that you have problems with yourself since you seem intent on hating on curvy girls. If you didn’t why would you make such judgmental comments like,

    “I’m not saying saying drop everything and become a total skelator, but really you’re not the only one that has to look at yourself.”

    That’s so degrading to your fellow women. We have enough problems with the media and their bullshit, we shouldn’t have to hear bullshit from someone who has issues with themselves.